Men and Women Can't Be Friends

If you follow me on twitter, you might have seen this video I posted a couple of days ago. If not, enjoy, before I dive in:

Honestly, you only have to watch the first minute to realize that it's true: men and women can't be friends. Without fail, every girl says yes, and every guy says no. It doesn't get much clearer than that, right?

I have a lot of things swirling around in my head about this one. I'm sure had I been interviewed, I would have said yes, just like the rest of the girls. Because I want to be friends with guys, but evidently, it's not gonna happen.

So I guess my only option now is to ask: what now?
If you agree (or if you don't!) that guy and girls can't be friends, what does that mean? How does that change communication and interactions between guys and girls? Should it change?

Does this make you want to watch When Harry Met Sally?
Please chime in with a comment, I'm really interested in what you have to say!

Learning: Why?

Hi.

How are you? Doing well? I hope you are.
Perhaps understandably, my last post was a little difficult to write and publish. Part of my stubbornness manifests itself in the form of wanting to seem like I've got it all together. I just want people to see that I can handle the things given to me, and do the tasks assigned to me with finesse.

So this post is even harder. The past few weeks, I've been thinking a lot about dating and relationships, and having conversations with a lot of people about those things. After having broken up with my boyfriend of five years in July, I casually dated a new guy. And then that kind of stopped, for various reasons: our personal goals and convictions are different, distance, and some other things I probably don't know about. And while I can reason that this is best, and it is what I actually want, I can't help but feel really deflated.

I've been thinking about that emotion, and telling people "Yeah, we're not gonna date, and that's probably best, but for some reason I'm really bummed." Most everyone just says, "Aw, that's tough. Sorry, " and gives that pity look -- you know the one.

So what? Why am I -- someone who is strong, smart, happy, and blessed -- feeling so helpless?
I think it comes down to how I relate to men.

I look to the men in my life to affirm, love, appreciate, lead, discipline, encourage and support me. Look at those things: they aren't bad, right? All positive elements of a good relationship. Except that the only place that I look for that is in men. Usually one.

Why?
I have a superb group of female friends and leaders, a supportive church family and mother, but for whatever reason, their attempts to fill those roles for me just seem to fall flat. Why?

Much to my dismay, I don't have the answer to that question. But I'm thinking about it, and praying about it. If you have any ideas, I'd be happy to hear them. It's gettin' real! Until next time, friends.

Hey Honey: Mauve or Magenta?

In a lot of media sources like TV/Film and radio, there is a stereotype that implies that men (husbands or boyfriends) don't care or are useless when it comes to home decorating.

You've probably seen it on a sitcom or romantic comedy at some point: the woman decorates an entire house without a drip of input from the man. In defense of some fictional women, they don't all steamroll their significant others -- some ask for an opinion only to be met by a disinterested grunt or a placatory "Honey, I'm sure I'll like whatever you choose!"

Evidently, I let the stereotype get into my head, because I recently helped my mother choose new bedding and bathroom accessories for my parents master bedroom suite. I was surprised by my Dad's input -- he had a lot to say about it! Even one of my regular reads blogs is a couple who works on their house together... I guess I had this one coming.

Funny enough, I shouldn't be surprised, because my own boyfriend has plenty of opinions about what does and doesn't look good: from my plans for redecorating my room to what shoes look best. (Sorry, he doesn't do outside consultations. :)

Any stereotypes get the best of you?