Life, etc.

After last summer's life-changing experiences, I figured that for my senior year of college, life would be relatively predictable. As you can probably guess, I was totally wrong! But, the unpredictable nature of this year has made it quite possibly the best year of my life. 

After being accepted for a teaching position with an overseas missions group, I spent the fall semester preparing and learning how to be the Christian woman, friend and leader God desires me to be. Then just before I returned to campus for spring semester I was introduced to a man named Brandon through some friends. From the moment we met, and in the weeks that followed, we both realized that something very real and significant was happening between us. Through prayer and plenty of conversation with each other and the important people in our lives, we happily entered into a serious relationship. Why through lots of prayer and conversation? 

"...accepted for a teaching position..." That's why. When I had come to the decision about my relationship with Brandon, I notified my future employers. Though they had advised me to remain single before leaving the country (starting a relationship before moving overseas for a year?), I explained how committed we are and the confirmation that we had both received from God about it. Despite that, they came back to me with an ultimatum, which boiled down to relationship vs. teaching position. 

I was pretty surprised, especially because of how strongly I was convicted about both situations, and so after more prayer and conversations with important people in my life, I decided to shelve the teaching position and remain in my relationship with Brandon. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done and it has definitely tested some of my friendships. 

So I'm back at square one for what's next in life, but I'm closer to God than ever, and happier than I thought was possible. It's been an exercise in trust and obedience and the blessings have been unbelievable. I'll be writing more about this whole process, but I wanted to let you in on why I've been MIA lately!

How's life, etc, for you?

"The Ultimate Questions"

The first week of school in 5 words:
Exciting
Chaotic
Wonderful
Surprising
Challenging

What a list, right? It's been a great week, and I can already see some hints of how the rest of the semester and year will pan out. But I can also see the difficulties that I will face in my own growth and in relationships with others.

This is my last year here at school (!?!!) and I have been reminded all summer long of the urgency that being a senior represents. I only have so much time to do the things that God is calling me to, and even as that is encouraging, I can sense the fatal idea behind it. If I don't do what I need to do, what God needs me to do, in this year, what serious consequences will come of it?

Today, I was reminded of why I'm here, in both a physical and spiritual sense.

In the first chapter of my Psychology 101 book, which introduces what psychology is, and how and why it's studied, the author tells you not to be concerned with psychology answering 'the ultimate questions' of life, as asked by Tolstoy:
"Why should I live? Why should I do anything? Is there in life any purpose which the inevitable death that awaits me does not undo and destroy?"

And you know what? I'm alright with psychology not trying to answer that question because I already know.
God created me with a purpose. He loves me and I can see that everywhere in my life, and I know that it will never be undone or destroyed by death.

Sometimes, encouragement comes from the most unexpected places.

Produce

Well, I'm back at school and things are getting into full swing. It's going to be quite the year, a year full of changes and miracles and hardships and joy.

Today, I decided to take some time alone to pray and read my bible instead of going to church. It seemed like a good idea to be alone, and just have time to recharge.

I'm studying Philippians right now, and for my first day, I finished with chapter one, verse 11.

(I'm particularly fond of the "God's Word" translation, so that's what I'll share with you.)

¹¹Jesus Christ will fill your lives with everything that God’s approval produces. Your lives will then bring glory and praise to God.

So, now I'm wondering, what is it that God's approval produces? I can come up with some stereotypical answers: blessings, happiness, the usual. But what is it that we receive by earning God's approval.

We already have his love, but by earning his approval, we gain something different, and I'm curious to what you think that is. Fill me in!

Seasons

Hello friends!

After a busy completion to the school year, I spent one week at home, one on Catalina Island at "Chapter Camp" and then 5 weeks having one of the most life-changing experiences I've ever had.

While I would be happy to fill you in totally on my five week cultural exchange, this is not the medium to do so in, so please, let me know if you would like to talk about it! But what I will talk about here is the changes that happened in my mind, in my heart and in my relationship with God.

While my semester was full of really fantastic and fun experiences, I was also struggling with maintaining a long distance relationship, though the distance was not the real issue. This came to a head at the end of the school year, and my boyfriend and I took a 'break' (which is essentially having space to think and process without dating other people). Then, I left for the exchange.

On the trip, I had the opportunity to spend a lot of time with God and with people who challenged me to follow and know God more fully. I spent a lot of time in scripture and worship. All in all, it was really inspiring and challenging trip, and some big things changed in my life.

So, the essentials:

Then: I thought I would graduate and then apply for the InterVarsity internship (which would still be awesome!) at my chapter.

Now: I really have a heart for global ministry, and hope to be preparing to move out of the country this time next year.

Then: I thought that I would be married to my boyfriend this time next year.

Now: I realize that our relationship was not all that it could have been, and our differences both in communicating and in our goals led to me ending the relationship.

Then: I was vulnerable in conversations or ways that made me seem like I had it all together.

Now: I'm real. I'm not perfect and I don't have to be. It's all good.

All in all? This summer is the best I've ever had. Can you believe it?

How is your summer so far?

Playing Favorites

As you might have gathered, for example in my "Who's Who" post, I'm not a fan of things being ranked or valued over other things.

However, I'm here to admit that I have been playing favorites. I have some favorite bible verses. Ha-cha-cha!

So obviously, having favorite bible verses isn't really a bad thing, right? So I thought I would round up a few of my favorites and share them with you. You never know, they might be just what you needed right now! It always seems that way with me.

Romans 12:12

"Be happy in your confidence, be patient in trouble, and pray continually."

All around just pretty good advice right? A lot of chapter 12 of Romans is simple truths like this.

Proverbs 31:20

"She opens her hands to oppressed people and stretches them out to needy people."

I love this verse, of course, since it's mentioned in my post about the vision God has for me!

Romans 1: 11-12

"I long to see you to share a spiritual blessing with you so that you will be strengthened. What I mean is that we may be encouraged by each other's faith."

My best friend sent me a text that only said "romans1 11-12" on a crazy day a couple of weeks ago, and that night when I got around to reading it, I was blown away. Having that kind of support is great and exactly what God expects from people who love him.

That's all I've got for now. Do you have a favorite, or even goofy verse that always comes to mind for you? Leave a comment! Who knows who might benefit from it!

Conviction: 31 Days to Serve the World

As I write this post, there are 6,887,790,073 people in the world, and the number keeps growing.(1)

In the United States alone, there are 310,823,879 people.(1)

That's all well and good, right? But here's what gets me:

This year, 4,617,263 have already died from water-related diseases, and since there are 1,452,739,846 people without access to clean water, the deaths will continue.(1)

This year, 1,867,113 people have died from HIV/AIDS, and another 32,885,805 people are infected.(1)

Today, in Africa, 2000 children under the age of 5 years old will die from Malaria. Hundreds upon hundreds of other children are affected by dirty water, lack of food, their parents' deaths and the deaths of their guardians.(2)

And though these statistics are just that -- numbers that tell you that tragedy is widespread -- these statistics are not only numbers. They are actual flesh and blood people. People that you and I should care about.

Here at Real Fine Place, December 2010 is the month of conviction. After having quite a few experiences that have showed me God's love, and how it should be extended to the world, I'm convicted that I have to love people the way Jesus would have -- people here and people a million miles away -- and that extends into telling other people about it. For the 31 days that make up December, each will have a post that I hope will provide you with a little insight, hope or inspiration to love the world the way Jesus does.

Each weekday, I'll post a little bit about one of four issues that I've chosen for the month: HIV/AIDS, Poverty in the US, Hunger, and Malaria. Then, on the weekends, posts will be about why helping others even matters, and what to do about it. Of course, regular posts will be peppered in too, so I hope you can keep up!

Here's to the world!
(The statistics at the top of the post come from 1. Worldometers and 2. World Vision)

The Who's Who

There is a phenomenon in the United States and the world over. It pervades conversations between close friends, gossip amongst rivals and diplomacy by leaders around the world. Sometimes it can be useful, but often it rationalizes poor decisions or behavior and assigns unrealistic values to people or things.

Ranking.

We love to rank, to grade, to sort, to arrange. We have the Billboard Top 100, "Sexiest Man of the Year", Best Cities in America to Raise a Family. There is the World's 10 Wealthiest People and the 25 Poorest Countries. The list, no pun intended, goes on and on.

The idea of ranking things irks me very deeply. It generalizes people and issues and usually it isn't pretty. It carries through to all elements of our lives, and to be honest, I'd love to eliminate it completely.

In Christianity, it springs up and makes for uncomfortable differences and distinctions -- problems are created unnecessarily between people. Too many times I have heard people minimize the struggles of others by comparing and ranking them.

"I had a rough day today, and I haven't eaten dinner yet."
"Well, you should be glad you are getting a meal at all, since hundreds of children die of starvation everyday."

Does this exchange help those starving children? No. Does it help the person who had a rough day and just needs a meal and a friend to talk to? No. It only serves to belittle the all-too-real struggles of someone who is right here, right now. And believe me, I'm not trying to say that our needs here are more important than starving children. There is no "more important" or "less important". There are only needs that must be satisfied -- ranking and valuing them doesn't help anyone. You should help the people you are equipped to help, right where you are.

What are the greatest commandments?

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind."

If we are following this commandment, then the second should become an extension of the first -- if we love God with everything we have, then won't we love the people he loves?

"Love your neighbor as you love yourself." (Find those in Matthew 22:37-40)

Our reaction to suffering or unhappiness in the lives of people around us should not be to put them in their place or even decide whether their struggle is big enough for us to care about. It should be to love them, because that is what God would do.

I'm not saying this will always be easy or fun. It probably won't be. But don't the people around you deserve God's love -- not because they are a starving child, but because they are His child?

So: love. Love the person next to you in class, or on the bus. Love the homeless man on your streetcorner. Love Billy Graham and Britney Spears. Love the poorest of the poor and the wealthy entrepreneurs. Just live it out, and don't bother deciding whose best or worst.

Me and God

Today, I went to my chapter of Intervarsity's bi-daily prayer meetings for the first time. I chose the time that was best for me, since I'll go back every week, and I brought my bible and my journal along with me. I wasn't quite sure what to expect (other than duh, praying) so I showed up and sat down. After explaining what it was all about, and what we would be doing structure-wise, we prayed.

We prayed for a full half hour -- about God's glory and goodness, about friends that we want to be impacted by God, and finally about anything else that came to mind.

And you know what? It was great.

Though I've tried different ways to get myself to pray more often, being forgetful as I am makes it hard. If I try to pray before I go to bed, I just fall asleep, and I want my prayers to be sincere, not just routine.

That was the difference at the prayer meeting. As we prayed about God's mercy and creativity, I was struck by an interesting thought. I was in this place for one half hour, and all I had to do was pray. I didn't need to pray quickly so I could fall asleep, or pray before I did my reading so I could hurry up and get to class. I just got to pray, without limitations or worries distracting me. I was there to pray, and that was it. No agenda, just me and God.

If you can get to one of these bi-daily prayer meetings, I would highly, highly recommend it. Don't have them set up at your school, chapter or church? Start a trend, guys. It's really worth it.

Is prayer sometimes difficult for you, too?
(P.S. Have you heard that Josh Turner song about Me and God?)

Cycling

Being a writer, I process best through writing down my thoughts. Because of this, I keep a couple journals -- one for everyday stuff: what I'm doing, what I think about the weather or what's been going on lately. My other journal is a prayer journal. I jot down bible verses I want to remember, notes from sermons and other messages and my thoughts on what I'm reading (remember I'm trying to read the whole bible this year?).

It's neat to flip back through and see what I've learned this year, as well as pick up on things that I mention repeatedly. Something that has been coming up often in my most recent entries is the word "cycle". (My apologies to everyone who thought this post would be about Bicycles.) As far as I can tell, a lot of the systems and situations God set up for us create cycles. Here are my thoughts and a couple examples of what I mean.

Financially supporting the church is an oft-discussed issue. Should you give, if so, how much and how often? Though it might seem in some places that the church is just asking for your cash every Sunday so they can buy the preacher a new convertible (this is a gross exaggeration), in fact, that money will come back to help you out. God made a system -- when you give to the church, and they help others, those others will give to the church and who knows when you may need that same help? Makes giving a little easier, right?

In 1 Corinthians 13, there is the famous section on the characteristics of love. These all function in a sort of cycle as well -- what you dish out; joy, humility, encouragment, self-control and forgiveness? These will be dished out to you in turn. It's not an accident that it works that way either. God planned things so that if we followed his plans that life would be a lot more enjoyable. We just need to get with it!

I'm working to get these things in order in my life. Any cycles you are familiar with?

Makin' Bacon

I don't know about you, but I'm terrible at managing money. I'm bringing home the bacon, but that's about as far as I'm getting with it. I need to figure out how to track my spending in order to be more responsible with my money.

To change that, I'm trying the "envelope method", which my grandparents used successfully their whole life together. According to your paycheck, you budget an amount for the things you will need -- for example, gas money. Then you take that money and put it in an envelope to carry with you, one envelope per category. The rest goes into savings. When the envelope is empty, that's your limit! It's a hard and fast way to curb wasteful spending.

For me, the thing I'm most excited about is making an envelope specifically for giving back to my chapter of Intervarsity and to my home church. I know that God will use my money to bless other people and that I'll be even more blessed than I already am! (Hope you don't think I sound hoity-toity, I really earnestly want to give back.) I've been inspired by recently finishing Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller. He has some great insights on money and how to handle it in regards to your faith.

What about you? Are you a money master or are you failing at reconciling your checkbook like I am? (I don't even know how to reconcile a checkbook. Oops.)

Lifting Up

In general, my family has always attended pretty traditional churches (Church of Christ, if you are wondering): a.k.a.; a capella, pretty reserved worship and singing, lots of standing and sitting through the service, and communion every sunday.

I will preface this by saying worship (here, singing) is my favorite part of church. I loooove it.

However, at InterVarsity, I've experienced a little different kind of worship. We do have a worship team that includes a few singers, a keyboard, drums, and several different bass and acoustic guitars (oh, and a banjo and violin sometimes too!).

But what is very different to me is the way that people respond to the worship, and to God, during our worship time. People with their hands palm up to the sky, one arm above their heads, both arms outstretched and all sorts of variations on that. Not everyone does it, and it's not for everyone anyway, but I do notice it quite often.

Why would I write about a personal thing like how people respond to worship?

Because I am totally blessed by seeing these people so moved by God and his presence. Though I've never been much of an arm-raiser, when I see my peers and classmates and friends worshipping God fully, it just fills my heart right to the brim. Though part of it lies in the fact that I know that I share in God's blessings with these people, another part is that a lot of adults who are our parents age and older seem to think that we college students are a bunch of hoodlums. But when I see the person a few seats down from me singing their heart out with their hands lifted up, I know that isn't true.

So if you think you might offend someone, or that it might not be appropriate for you to respond to God in a physical, visible way - go ahead - there might be someone just like me watching and waiting to be blessed.

God is good. :)