As you might have inferred from the title of this post, I've been skimming over something for a while that I can't believe I missed. Remember this post from way back, about how I really wanted to hear from God about what he had planned for my future? Go back and read it. It's quick.
Just kidding. But in case you hadn't noticed, I never updated with what God had told me! Was that because I forgot? No. Because I wanted to keep it a secret? No. It was because he hadn't told me anything.
That was what I didn't realize. To be honest, I was a little put-out. I thought, "God, if you will tell Jordan what you want her to do with her life, what is the difference with me?" It seemed unfair, silly, and I racked my mind for months. What was I not doing right? Did I have some grudge to forgive, some person to reconcile with, some sin I hadn't repented of or confessed?
Then I stopped worrying about it. I don't know how it happened really, since I just let it go, but I did. I wasn't laying awake at night wondering where I would be in five years or whether I needed to change my major or who-knows-what.
Over the past few months, I've been doing a verse-by-verse study of the Proverbs 31 woman. It's my favorite passage in the Bible, but I hadn't ever really studied it. So in the prayer room last night, the memory of my future came back, so I prayed about it, asking for a purpose, a plan. I opened my bible, and after skimming a few verses in Chronicles absentmindedly, I opened to my bookmark. My bookmark that has the picture of my sponsored child.
I had opened to the end of Proverbs, and when I checked which verse I was supposed to study next, it hit me.
"She opens up her hands to oppressed people and stretches them out to needy people."
Proverbs 31:20. I felt it. This -- this verse, right under my nose -- was the one I had been looking for. And where did I find it? In my favorite passage, marked by the little girl who is the needy that I need to stretch my hands out to. I wanted to dance, to jump up and down and sing and squeal. God had showed me what he wanted, and I can't be more excited to do it.
Are you still waiting to hear from God? Don't give up.